I think I blew it again
I tried to reach a bio cousin. I let her read my blog, hoping that she would understand me, and see that I was hurt by our family, but instead she told me I harbored scary hate and anger.
So that did not go well.
She said that the family decided that no one should contact me, ever again, because I’ve been mean. I guess I have been.
I don’t know what to do now, or how to fix it. I guess I can’t. I found them 6 years ago, and it was never good. I said things, they said things. They told each other things, and decided to shun me.
I tried. Maybe once you’re given up, you can never go back.
I just wish it didn’t hurt so much